30.4.07

Stellastar!

So many random things that I want to type out right now, but where to start?

Ok, I'm loving Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss by the Bloodhound Gang. I'm pretty sure it's been mentioned in my blog before, but who cares? It's just that good! Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby! I can't stop head-banging to it. And screaming. And dancing. And laughing. And doing anything else that comes to mind.

I'm hoping that tomorrow I'll be going to this huge booksale. Prices start from $1! OMG!!! LOVE! Haha I'm whacked. I hope all the good stuff isn't gone. And I hope I'll actually be allowed to buy stuff. Please oh please let everything go right. I so need a break from all the drama that's going on in my life.

BB and I had a heart to heart last night. Or rather last last night. And last morning. Yes, your dear D stayed up way way past midnight until the wee hours of the morning, probably sending the phone bill skyrocketing through the roof. All because she was on the phone. Sweet. I love BB. Sometimes I think that I can't tell her stuff, but then I end up spilling everything out. It's because she gets me. And I get her. It's the most beneficial and deep friendship I've ever been in. Not to mention the longest. Usually I'm in the friendship for the company. To be accompanied, I mean. Not for the person. For me. I know I'm selfish. But BB and I are friends because we really want to be. We don't even have to be with each other all the time. In fact, we're apart so often, people don't believe that we're best friends.

It's great of BB to always reassure me that she's got my back. She told me that N is not going to ditch me just because J and C want her to. I truly hope so. W is a different story. He's already lost to me. And I'm not going to fight for him, because I don't think he'd care that much anymore. V is being an utter sweetheart. And a pain in the butt. I'm not even going to dignify his nonsense with replies. Okay, I did reply. But with an equal amount of nonsense and a load of hahahahahahas.

I am also mucho grateful to P for just caring about how I feel. She's not the most sensitive or emphatic person (quite far from that actually), but she tries. When she knows that someone's down, she'll be one of the first people to try and comfort you. I still remember her calling me frantically on the phone just because she thought I was going to commit suicide. Silly girl. Don't you know I'm afraid of dying?

My brother was playing the guitar just now, and I'm not going to tell him this, but he was really good. Sometimes I envy my brother. He seems to have it all figured out, just because he's good in music. The guitar and drums, to be exact. He wants to be a professional musician, and I think he can be. It's talent, pure and simple. Of course, I'd never admit to him that I actually think he's good at something. That's what sisters are for. Actually, you'd be surprised at how we're viewed. I'm the sane, logical one who'll go into something brainy. He's the noisy weird creative artsy fartsy one, who'll grow up to be a hippie. Lovely plans everyone's got for us.

Shhh... Don't tell anyone, but I've been secretly trying to track down my cousins. Hard to do when you're on the opposite side of the globe, but I'm trying. Here's what I've gotten so far. Their school, and the fact that they're in second and fourth grade. Well done Sherlock. Seriously though, I'm trying. I hope something comes up quick.

I've also been hit by study fever, a serious and rare condition that usually occurs around exam season. Unfortunately, my case has happened even without the presence of looming tests. I'm just in the mood to study. So much, that I've already planned what I'm going to study for the rest of the year. I think I deserve a pat on the back, don't you? And probably a blow to the head to counteract the first one. It's a known fact among everyone in my class. " D? Study? Are you serious?! She never studies. She sleeps!" Sad, but true. I'll pick up a book, attempting to fill my head with knowledge. Unfortch, I study on my bed. And five minutes later, the Sand Man is dragging his sack of sand to another house.

Speaking of which, I think I'm a bit sleepy. Make that really sleepy. I think I'm going to attempt to fuse with my bed right now. That would be the best thing ever. Ciao!

28.4.07

Songs For The Deaf

Sanctuary. Is a word which here means a small, safe place in a troubling world. Like an oasis in a vast desert or an island in a stormy sea.

Where is mine?

It is that feeling you get when you know something is wrong. Like you've missed a very important chance to do something. Or something has been taken away from you, something you value with your life. But you don't know what it is. You don't know what to do. You don't even know why you're feeling this way.

But I do.

I know why I am so upset. Furious. Dissappointed. Frustrated. Depressed. Frightened. Dead.

Please don't do this to me. I have done nothing to you. Does it truly amuse you to afflict such mental torture on me that I'm struck by panic attacks? Is it enjoyable - watching me gasp for air and cry? Why must you be so cruel. I have never wished ill upon you. I go out of my way to avoid angering you. And yet you strike out everytime you get a chance, hoping to draw blood.

My sanity is all that I truly own right now. If you had a heart, you would understand. Take away my friends. You won't succeed, because I drove them away by myself. I didn't want them to get involved in this. But deep down, you can't hide the fact that you're jealous of me. Jealous that I've always been better at everything. Jealous that I'm the only person who's come close enough to take everything away from you. Just because you took everything away from me. I forgave and forgot. You never did.

You hit out at me because I was the only person kind enough to let it go. You knew I wouldn't bitch back, wouldn't tell everyone to stop liking you. You did that instead. No one believed you. But you couldn't stop, could you? You tried to get me to like you, so you could mess with me. I fell for nothing. None of your lies.

I thought we were grown up. That we were mature enough to stop petty arguments and fights. But I was wrong. I knew I would be. You're the kind of person who loves seeing me suffer. Me. Just me. Don't you think it wasn't obvious? Everyone sees what you're doing. If only you weren't in your throne. Then you would fall just like I did.

But the only difference is, you would die.

27.4.07

Platoon

It's been less than a week since my last entry, but already so much has changed.

I shall be partially emceeing for our sports event, I think. I hope not, because I tend to slur my words. Which might cause the chairman to think that I am drunk. Oh well. Besides, I'm supposed to speak perkily and cheerfully. Fail! That's like asking me to put on my bimbo personality, since it is the only time that I can actually act happy convincingly.

I'm pretty sure that C has it out for me, and is plotting with J to destroy my social life completely. Don't worry guys, I've already finished the job for you. God they make it so hard for me to be happy and sane. I don't know what to do anymore, so I've just given up trying to be nice to them and started ignoring them.

V's asked me to prom. In a friendly way, of course. I then reminded him that 1) prom is really really far away, 2) we've got exams to think about, 3) I might be vacationing by then and 4) he's supposed to ask BB! I think number 4 might be out of our hands though. I'm pretty sure she's going off to college soon. Overseas. I don't think either V or her parents would be willing to fork out enough money for a plane ticket back here.

W and I are drifting apart. It seems so sad and sudden. Yes, J and C are behind this. But I can't blame them completely though. I think we've grown so different this month. We've gone through so much and changed into different people altogether. I guess now we've got to decide if we're still good, or if we should just leave each other as we are.

Let's talk happy now. Too much ranting and sighing has been going on lately. Let's see. Oh yes. Mommy's birthday has just passed. We took her out to dinner. And wouldn't you know it, her birthday gift isn't ready yet. We'll be giving it to her a whole week late, I think. I'm so sorry, but I know she doesn't mind. The dinner was lovely, by the way. I had my mushroom rolls with the pine nuts and the cheese. It was good.

I went snack shopping yesterday at Marks and Spencers. I love their chocolate toffee cookies. I'm not quite sure what they're called but I do know that they have said delicious things in them. Toffee! Then I pigged out on their crisps. Red Leicester and Spring Onion. Oh yes, D can be such a swine at times. Let that be a lesson to all of you. Just because I don't look like I eat a lot doesn't mean that I'm not capable of it. Love the high metabloism rate.

Oh yeah, I got four new novels from the bookstores in the nearest mall. Two of them I begged Mommy to buy because I wanted to read them, but now all I can think about is Physics. Ever since that PostSecret secret I saw that day, I wonder if divine intervention was involved. N knows about this. See, what happened was that I was surfing the Net during Physics lessons. The teacher's kind of weird, so he didn't notice. Then I went to PostSecret and the first secret I saw. " I'm supposed to be learning Physics but instead I'm looking at PostSecret." Well, something like that. And N screamed with laughter and said it was a sign that I was to pay attention and stop doing silly things like that. Then she shut the lappy.

But the point is that I was so shocked by the coincidence. Those close to me know that coincidences and miracles are a regular part of my life by now. But this one was kind of weird. And disturbing. Haha. This was last week by the way so don't bother trying to look it up now. But do enjoy reading all the secrets. I know I do.

I also got this literature book that I needed. $50 bucks for a mere paperback novel of such slenderness is sheer highway robbery. The book is thinner than my finger, and that's already thin. Well, it's the same size, but just almost. Haha not making sense much? Actually, I am elated that I found it for my literature class, because I didn't want to photocopy the whole text. That would be ugly. And I like pretty books. My parents agreed, and they are awesome. I just need to find a copy of the play, and by copy I mean a book. No pieces of paper stapled together. That would be, once again, ugly. I'm shallow in the weirdest ways.

In other news, I have also decided to stop using the word awesome due to my ears having been raped with the unbecoming sound of some twit saying it with the voice of a deranged surfer. It goes like this. Awww-suhhhhhhhhh-ummmmm. And yes, it is as irritating as it looks. Twice as irritating, in fact. But only if that twice was multiplied by infinity. I now have this crazy urge to bang the keys until one of them pops off. Maybe the letter E, because then it would be funny to see me write a whole article without using the letter e. The letter e. The letter e. Hahaha retard. But seriously, I will try that someday. It will be a linguistic challenge.

Darn it 10 more 10 more! Pairs of earrings to go, I mean.

I saw this adorable stuffed unicorn the other day, and I mean to get it. It is the sugariest pink ever, if there's such a word. Deliciousness! I shall name it Peppercorn, Princess Peppercorn. Or not.

Something that starts with p.

Pythagoras.
Placebo.
Puffy.

Pillow...

I'm sure I'll think of something by then.

22.4.07

Someday I'll Cross You In Style

So we went for this chocolate buffet thingy last night, and by we I mean the guys and I, and by last night I mean four hours ago. We were so totally out of place there - a swanky hotel lounge full of well-dressed people, then N and I walk in. Hahaha the look on their faces. Priceless. We were in tees and jeans. Well, at least I was. N was in some sporty outift and sandals. Sandals! Then I told her that I should have worn that cocktail dress after all. She laughed.

Actually I was ambushed the minute I came in. By N and the rest. They shocked me into screaming so loud I thought we were gonna be kicked out. But we weren't. Whew. The food was okay - I liked one of the cakes and their ice-cream was pretty good. The company sucked, cause C and J came, and bitched the whole night. Froze me right out of my own conversation. P told me to ignore them, but I was too busy ranting. Didn't see J's brother sitting near us, and was horrified when I spotted him. I don't really care though. He can tell her what I said. She deserves it.

Props and much love to my darlings N, P and V who basically stayed with me so as not to let me suffer alone. JN was surprisingly nice too. Love you guys mucho!

Sanjaya's out. Finally!

I'm having the worst rashes ever. I'm pretty sure it's an allergy, but I don't know what I'm actually allergic to. They've been going on for weeks and I am so irritated - they itch! Like a thousand mossie bites, but worse. Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating, but I can't stand it. Best of all, they're multiplying. Whee! Whee!

I shall get my hair cut. But when? And how?

Lit classes are alright. The teacher thinks I'm a freak because I don't ask too many questions and seem to understand everything she says. Umm... maybe it's because I actually do. English is not that hard, and Lit is just another branch of English, right? I need an A*!

Gosh all that chocolate has made me so drowsy. I thought they're supposed to keep you awake cause they have caffeine in them, but they're not working. Okay now, I need to go sleep. Night!

Oh and by the way, I aced that Math test I didn't study for. Haha. 95! I rock my socks. Maybe my reward will be more shopping. :P haha I wish.

Later...

8.4.07

Great Imaginary Conversations

Funniest thing I've heard in a long time.

Quando Dio vol castigar un omo
el ghe mete in mente de maridarse

Basically translated, it means,

When God wants to punish a man, he makes him want to get married.

Hilarious, no? Well, I think so.

The weather is now very hot and damp. It rains almost everyday, but still the temperature rises and rises and rises and yeah... Gosh, I forgot. I have school tomorrow. Nooooo. I need to remember to bring all this stuff, but I don't want to lug so much junk to school. And we have a History presentation. Great. I need to start preparing for it. Hahaha. Life sucks.

We went on a trip yesterday, and by we I mean my family and I, because I am so lacking a social life right now. But I digress. Anyways, the mall there wasn't all too bad. Actually, we were there to look at show houses, cause my Dad has been trying to buy another house for god knows how long. So after the hoohah, we went to have lunch at the mall. Nothing special. I was so bored, I got my sushi and walked around to entertain myself. Then, I saw them.

Earrings for like dirt cheap. Okay, not dirt cheap but kinda cheap. So duh, I got some. Three more. Now, I only need like 13 more pairs to achieve my goal. Yeah I know, I can be uber materialistic, but whatever.

One of the most beautiful books I've read in a long long time is Carnevale. I don't even know how to describe it, so I won't. All I'll say is that, when I read the book, I really felt like I was in Venice. The description is lush, the characters charming and sensual. It is definitely one of my favourite books. I know that not everyone will like the book, and it is not perfect. However, it has a certain air to it that made me not want to put down the book for even a split second. And for that, I have fallen in love with it.

I have eaten far too much today. But how can you resist baked beans and scrambled eggs? How?! The madness. The torture. The constant rumbling of my protesting stomach. I shall not have breakfast tomorrow then.

The puppy on my wall is yawning. Now I am yawning.

Night!

2.4.07

Elementary, My Dear Watson

HAPPY BELATED APRIL FOOL'S!

Haha. Random much? I think my friends and I've grown out of playing pranks on each other and all that kind of stuff. The 1st of April was pretty much uneventful, except for W, who proved that he was even lamer than we thought. Ohmigosh I can't believe M fell for it. She is so so dumb.

I realize that I don't swear much. I mean, the word damn slips out sometimes, but nothing else. Okay, so it's been one hectic week at school. We've had like so much stuff to do, and we had our sports competitions and everything. So F and I were waiting for the results of one, cause we're like on the same team, and we were both really stressed out. I don't remember what he said, but it was a bit offending, so I said "Eff you." No, I'm not replacing the F-word with eff. I really did say that. And F was really shocked. He said it was the first time he'd heard me even come close to saying a bad word. So yeah, how bout that?

I also realize that I can be really really competitive when it comes to sports. I'm not really into sports and all these physical activities, in case you haven't noticed. However, I've been labelled as the girl who can do almost anything, so if they need someone in the team, I'm usually picked. And let me tell you, I'm actually the kind of person who's labelled girly and soft. Haha. Big joke. But anyways, I'm not very violent. But when I get on the field, I can be quite aggressive. Weird.

Which brings me to my next point.

We won! I'm not going to tell you which sports I played, but we got gold! It felt so good to beat the crap out of those sore losers. I got punched in the face and caught in a choke-hold, but I was too far gone to care. Five entire days of being burnt to a crisp under the sun was so worth it. N and I nearly cried - me because I was so relieved, and N because she lost her match. It's okay babe. We'll get through it.

It's no surprise that I'm feeling the aftermath of last week though. Fevers, sore throats and coughs abound. I know, I have a sexy voice now. All gravelly and low. I had a blast at the mall though. Shopping for hours! Green stuff, and I'm not talking money. A jacket and a dress. Books. Cinny buns! Sandwiches and chips. I love weekends!

Arrgh. How frustrating is it to be 1 mark away from an A*? Very. I know, I know. I'm greedy. But I need the grades. Finals are coming! I'm so dead. And plus, our annual Sports Day is just around the corner. Wonderful.

Things I love.

Sleep.
Sleep.
Eat.
Sleep.
No school.
Money.

Things I'm sick of.

School!
American Idol ( ohgod the whole Sanjaya thing)
Hot weather
Not having enough money to get stuff
Not getting enough sleep.
My constant illness

I guess I get a new boyfriend every week, huh? Last week it was F. The week before it was W. Who's it gonna be this time, huh? Why don't people just stop creating rumours?

Natalie Portman and Jonathan Rhys Meyers are two of my favourite actors.
I don't like Emma Watson and Hilary Duff. They should just stop torturing people with their movies.
Which reminds me.

Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows?

Ok, I'm not trying to be mean here, but what was she thinking? If I was going to write the final book in a humongously popular and well-loved series, I don't think that'd be the name for it. I mean, come on. Deathly. Hahahaha. Maybe it's not too late for a global title recall.

Book 6 (HBP), in the words of W, sucked ass. Too much romance, too much angst and silent emo-ing. Too little plot. I don't even know if I'll buy the 7th book. Pfft. D passing up the last novel and not finding out how something ends? Hah! That'll be the day. I don't think I'll pre-order the book though. Prolly'll wait till the hype dies down a little. There might even be a discounted price. Oh yeah, D is a stingy miser.

Please oh please stop playing Beautiful Liar. It makes my ears hurt.

W, please take my place tomorrow.
N, please take care of yourself cause we need you to help us win this.
P, please take care of N.
BB, Iloveyou!

We finished our interviews!

Bye all.